Review: Dollar Shave Club

We like to fall down Internet rabbit holes. Find one thing funny on youtube and follow the links and see where they take us.

Not too long ago, the rabbit hole brought us here:

The commercial is hysterical, right? After a few months of discussion and, really, paying too much for razors and/or blades, we took the DollarShaveClub.com plunge. About a week later, a package arrived in the mail. 

I was a bit disappointed in the packaging, but, really, I understand. The bare bones packaging helps to keep the cost down. With the commercial, though, I just expected more jokes. 

We opted for the 4x, aka "The Lover's Blade." The handle that comes with the blades has a high quality feel. It really has some heft to it, and it looks nice too. Cause you know how important it is to look fancy while shaving. 

The blades are truly fantastic. I have very sensitive skin while shaving and, even with sub-par shave cream, the DollarShaveClub.com blades left me with minimal irritation.  With a good shave cream (eos, represent!) the irritation will be non-existent. 

So, basically, two thumbs up. Or four, if you count Mickey, cause I'm pretty sure he likes 'em too.

Paperback Writer

Since being unemployed, I have made it a goal to write at least an hour a day. Initially, I thought I would do that writing on this here blog.

Obviously, I did not.

But, I have been writing erry'day. For years, there have been bazillions of ideas rolling around in my head, so I decided to tackle some of them. Right now, I have four different projects going on.

1. Semi-autobiographical essay things.
2. A short story about the "Best Exit in Florida." Note: Recently, I visited the REAL self-proclaimed "Best Exit in Florida" last weekend. Verdict? Not that great at all.
3. Poems. I feel very stupidly pretentious to say that I am writing poetry, but I think it is my favorite. It's like a puzzle to choose the words that work the best.
4. D and I are writing a musical together. Out of all of them, this is what I am having the most fun with. This one just happened randomly. We were listening to a CD on the way to dance one day and D said, "This would make a great musical." I replied, "So, let's write one." So, we are.

Writing about writing seems lame. So, I will stop.

'S Wonderful

Recently, I became slightly obsessed with the Cleveland Show. I watched every single episode within about a week. Most of the time, the family humoured me, watching right alongside me. Even though Mickey had already done the exact same thing about a week earlier, he watched almost all of them over again. That's an awesome fella right there. And, well, the Cleveland Show is that funny.  I literally laugh at least twice an episode.

Well, to my great sadness, I finished the Cleveland Show. That left me with no background TV noise. So I went fishing on Netflix. D whined about everything I lingered over and, eventually, I ended up just putting something on before she got a chance to see what it was.

She started judging immediately, "What is this ridiculous cover of a Beatles song?" She even told me she was judging me. However, within two minutes, she was complimenting the opening lines. Within ten, she stopped typing on her keyboard. Twenty minutes into the first episode, she started comparing one of the main characters to Mickey. By the time Kevin and Winnie shared their very first kiss, she was hooked. 

I am almost having as much fun watching her reactions as I am the show itself. 

And... for the record? Even though I was afraid it wouldn't, the show totally holds up. 

Ready to Rock

No, no, not more Rock Band talk, I promise. However, we are now ranked #1 on a song:

On vocals, at least.

About a month or so ago, Mickey and I went to a wedding. The wedding was fantastic, the bride looked lovely and the groom was very bouncy. We drank, we danced, we took lots of pictures with disposable cameras.

But, my favorite part, and the part I was most looking forward to, didn't happen til the next day.

After breakfast at a place that reminded me of eating in a grandmothers kitchen in the 1950's (best Eggs Benedict, ever, btw) we drove a little further down the road and went gem mining.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved gem mining. I was so excited (and somewhat nervous) to share one of my favorite things in the world with Mickey. Excited because, you know, rocks are awesome. Nervous because, you know, if you don't like rocks, gem mining is boring as hell.

But, before you get bored reading about rocks, here are some pictures of our loot:

And seriously? That's not even a quarter of the awesomeness. 

Apparently,  gem mining isn't as common as I thought. So here's how it goes.

You buy a big bucket of dirt. The super-passionate gem-mining dood gives you a wooden box with a screen for a bottom and a spade-shovel-thingie. Then he leads to to this trough of running water that is normally a couple different levels. 

You sit on an uncomfortable wooden bench and drop a spade-full of dirt into your wooden-screen box. Then you shake it about and gently lower it into the water, letting it wash away all the dirt. Then you sift through what is left and, hopefully, find real treasure. 

And we totally did. We found quartz and tiger's eye and flourite and topaz and amethyst and some gorgeous jasper. But even better than that, we found rubies, sapphires and emeralds. This whole glass is filled with them, in fact:

Looks just like plain boring rocks, don't they? But once polished and cut, they are gorgeous. We just haven't made it that far yet. 

Rubies were probably the most fun for us to find because they sound different than all the other rocks. They are heavier than other gems, so when the water pushes them down the trough, they give off a deeper sound. We got a few of our rubies from the couple who was mining upstream from us. Shhh.

We killed almost two hours gem-mining. I am happy to report that Mickey enjoyed himself and now I have a lot more awesome to add to my rock collection. 

Don't judge. Rocks are awesome. 

I Know Why the Caged Bird... Laughs?

I have been a fan of SNL since I was a little girl and would stay up late  on Saturdays to watch it with my dad.

Yeah, sometimes the cast has sucked and sometimes the writers have been crappy, but I almost always laugh at least once every episode.

Well, this past weekend we watched the episode Maya Rudolph hosted. In that episode was the funniest skit since last year's smash hit "Liquorville."

It is hysterical and quoteable, which basically is my favorite one-two punch of SNL-isms. I present you with Maya Angelou's new prank show: "I Know Why the Caged Bird Laughs." 

More Talk About the Same Book

 I finished "We Need to Talk About Kevin" last night. It was fantastic the entire way through.

One thing that normally annoys me about books and movies is the ability to predict the end. I was able to predict the end of this one, but I wasn't bothered by it. Like I said before, the author of this book built things masterfully: her characters, her situations, and, most importantly, suspense. She unraveled things beautifully.

Yeah, I had figured out the end of the book before the end, but I kind of got the idea that the author wanted the reader to figure it out. So that the reader could experience the same dread and horror that Eva experienced. And I totally did. I knew  what was going to happen. I mean, not just the big thing that she talks about the entire book, but the rest of the ending. I knew  it would happen and I kept reading, hoping for a twist that wasn't this.

This was one of those books that I want to start immediately after I read the last word. I want to just immerse myself in it and pick up on all the things I missed the first time.

But, I won't, because I have Chew waiting for me. =)

Smarties: The Book I Am Currently Reading Edition

Sometimes I will be reading a book and read something that just resonates with me. Right now I am reading "We Need To Talk About Kevin" by Lionel Shriver.

It is so good. It's one of those books that you can't shake all day. I've been slowly savoring it for about two weeks now and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about it more than once. Shriver is talented because she has created a character that is extremely easy to dislike for two thirds of the book, but within a paragraph and a half, she makes you feel sorry for him and want to take care of him. Or maybe I have just gone all soft. 

I am almost to the end of the book and really loathe to finish it, mostly because I am dreading what will happen at the end. I mean, I know the big horror that happens; it's inevitable. But I worry that there will be a surprise horror as well. I also don't want to finish it because it is that good. It may sound weird, but I'll miss it when I'm done. 

That's one of the reasons I like the Walking Dead comics so much, I always have a new issue to anticipate. And by anticipate, I mean wait impatiently. 

So, back to "Kevin." 

Sunday morning, I was standing in the kitchen, cooking breakfast for the family, reading my book in between stirring and baking and flipping the sausage around and I read a line that reminded me a lot of what a very good friend once said to me:

"[A] common mistake of the good hearted: She assumed that everyone else was just like her."

I am slightly guilty of this. Sometimes, it really frustrates me. 

And in closing, Tilda Swinton was cast perfectly in this role. I cannot wait to see the movie. 

Continuing to Rock.

Sorry, no time to blog.

Too busy rockin'.

The song was "Handlebars" by Flobots, for the record.

Broken

I have a confession to make.

I can't use chopsticks. I have tried about a billion times, but they just don't work for me. I have had private lessons, looked at diagrams, tried to surreptitiously observe other people and then imitate. The chopsticks just wildly flail, unable to do anything with the food in front of me. Except, if I am lucky, make a huge mess.

Aware of my plight, the last couple times we went to get sushi, Mickey had the foresight to ask them to bring me childrens chopsticks. I could totally use them! Without any problems at all! I felt very accomplished, even though I had a colorful piece of plastic at the end of my chopsticks, holding them together.

Homework

So, D gave me an assignment today:

Respond to two of these BONUS POINTS IF YOU DO ALL THREE :
1. Your character is hungry. They’ve found their favorite snack in a vending machine (be it human arms, peanuts, ect). Once they put their money in, Mr. Machine decided not to give them their food. How do they react?
2. Somebody randomly hands your character a live duck. What do they do?
3. Your character is walking down the street when suddenly a cat makes its way into the road. It is promptly flattened by a van. How does your character react?

Here are my results.

“Hola, Senorita Giant! What on earth do expect me to do with this duck?! I have no hands with which to grab him. My paws are too small to keep the duck from falling off of this steep, scary red roof. Meow, meow, meow. Ooh, I bet the fluffy, white cat who has been writing letters to me would like this duck as a gift. I should go give it to her! Can you fashion a leash out of these old gum wrappers? Thanks!”

With that, Old Senor Don Gato was on his way, the duck trailing behind him, thoroughly confused. The journey to the white, fluffy cat was long and tiring and, halfway there, Senor Don Gato was hungry. Luckily, he came across a cat treat vending machine and happened to have two quarters tucked away in his collar. The perfect amount for a Tuna Tastee Treat. He climbed the ladder to the coin slot and used his snout to nudge the coins into the machine. Clink! One coin fell in. Clank! Another coin reached it’s destination. Don Gato used the paw not holding the duck’s leash to push button A3 and eagerly awaited his Tuna Tastee Treat.

It almost fell. The delicious fish flavored snack was just hanging there, begging to fall and, eventually, fall into Senor Don Gato’s belly. He had no idea what to do. Glancing around desperately, he tied the duck’s bubble gum wrapper leash to the nearest post and started throwing himself against the vending machine. The treat refused to budge. Each time, Senor Don Gato ran back farther and farther, almost into the street, slamming the entire weight of his body into the vending machine.

Finally, the Tuna Tastee Treat moved just a small inch. This is it, Don Gato thought and ran back farther than he ever had before. He lost his balance when he reached the curb and stumbled onto the road, where a white molester van immediately flattened him. Distraught, the duck fought against his gum wrapper leash, breaking free to run to Don Gato’s aid. In his rush, the duck white, fluffy tail bumped the vending machine, knocking the Tuna Tastee Treat loose from it shiny metal prison. Alas, Don Gato would never get to enjoy it.

The New Phone Book's Here! The New Phone Book's Here!

Ok, so not really.

But even more exciting, my ukelele is waiting for me at home!

I am presently picking out songs to learn this evening.

Smarties: Chick Edition

For the record, yes, I seem to have gone full chick. Or at least damn close to it.

I have no idea how this happened.

This is the stupid quote I am feeling today. Dammit.

“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”
-Dr. Seuss

He was a wise man. 

Craftin'

Happy Valentine's Day!

I made a craft.

I hope your Valentine's Day is as awesome as mine!

Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs.

I think the universe wants us to win the lottery. 

We woke up Saturday morning and on our counter was one of those small slips of paper that tell you the winner lotto numbers. 

I haven't played the lotto in months. Possibly even years. Nor has Mickey. There was absolutely no explanation for this ticket thingie on our counter. So, we took it as a sign. 

But we forgot to actually buy a ticket. 

Then Saturday, we walked over to our local Moose Lodge for a couple drinks. Right as we were getting ready to leave, they started a raffle. We bought $5 worth of tickets and finished our drinks. 

We totally won. 

As I walked up to accept our prize, I even had to ask, "What in the world did we win?"

We won a ridiculous huge basket filled with booze and bbq stuff. I mean, seriously gigantic. 

So, obviously our luck is awesome, right?

Well, Sunday, we ran some errands and normal weekend boringness. During one of these errands, a wayward lotto ticket made it into the car. 

Our next stop was a convenience store to buy a lotto ticket. 

Wish us luck!

Zmobies

You know what happens this Sunday?

I am ridiculously excited. 

A few months ago, at the repeated insistence of a friend, I started reading the comics. 

Halfway through the first issue, I was completely addicted. I told Mickey, "You have to start this the second I am finished with it so we can watch the show." He did and became just as addicted as me. 

The first season of the show encompasses the entire first volume or small book or whatever. (I don't know all my comic book terms yet.) So, when he was done with it, we started on the show. D watched along with us and got herself all emotionally invested in it. 

One of the things about the book to show adaptation that I found remarkable was that the show creators did not stick with the book's story arcs. In fact, they deviated quite a bit. Even more remarkable? I liked it. I am normally one of those people who get all offended when they stray from a book, particularly when they add things. But with TWD, I was fine with everything save for one small detail which kind of changes the tenor of things to come, but, I am curious to see where that goes. 

So, after we made it through the halfway mark of Season Two (and what a way to end!), Logan moved in. A comic lover already, he started reading the books. Then, addicted like the rest of us, he wanted to watch the show. So, we did. 

Somewhere in between all of this stuff, we took a trip to the ATL, where much of TWD takes place. Throughout the entire trip, the whole family participated in random "zombie apocalypse checks." Basically, one of us would yell, "ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE" and the rest of us would have to say what exactly we would do if we came upon a herd of zmobies right at that second. This little game got Spencer sucked into the family zmobie obsession. 

So, now, zmobies are a family affair. 

I can't wait to see what TWD has for us all on Sunday. 

Oh, and, if you're curious? I didn't stop my comic-ing at TWD. I read some one offs and some more traditional comics. In fact, I just started this:

And I LOVE it. 

Smarties: Dr. Seuss Edition

The Lorax is probably my favorite children's book. Aside from it's great environmental message, there are quite a few stand alone quotes that one could apply to their daily lives.

This one has resonated with me quite a bit today:

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
nothing is going to get better. It's not."

And, for the record? I will NOT be seeing the new Lorax movie.

Tappin'

D raced out of the dance studio last night, legs flying, arms akimbo. "Mom," she yelled "Come in and watch!"

Like the obedient mom I am, I complied.

It was my first time in D's new studio and, holy crap, is it nice. Immediately, I was jealous. I mean, so jealous that I felt it physically.

I really, really miss tap dancing. I miss being challenged with new rhythms and trying them over and over again til I am sweaty and exhausted. One of my favorite feelings was getting something new right for the very first time.

Aside from missing tap a ridiculous amount, I also got to watch D kill a swag hip hop dance. Her dancing skills have grown immensely in the last five months. I can't wait to see her dance concert in a couple months.

Failin'

So, apparently, I am not-so-great at the blogging every day thing.

Well, I guess I do okay at it during the week, so far, but the weekends, I predict, will be tough.

I have no excuse really. I just like spending actual time with my family. I don't have time for any fancy blogging technology!

Rock Bandin'

I bet you didn't know I was in a Rock Band. I totally am. Our name is "The Four Rustys." Sometimes, however, there are five of us.

Our logo is kind of awesome.

But I have a bone to pick with the band, really. I think they are the reason I suffered from squeaky-Frogman voice all week. At work they either called me Lauren Bacall or Kathleen Turner (before she was a beast!) I gladly took the Bacall comparisons. I mean, despite Bogey ogling Marilyn, Bacall was still a hottie. 

So because of suffering from squeaky voice, I worried all week that I would be unable to perform with the band this weekend. I am still a bit scratchy today, but I think I can do it. 

I mean, I don't want to let our biggest fan, Derby Shire, down. 

Okay, okay, so I am not really in a real rock n' roll band. We just spend practically our entire weekend playing Rock Band. It's FUN. I actually think the adults are having more fun than the kids. We stay up later than they do trying to achieve goals and fans. They take breaks. We do not. 

That's mostly because we are awesome.

Smarties

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."

-Albert Einstein

Mini-Movie-Obsessions

I think I have passed something weird down to D.

I love movies. Maybe even a little bit more than a normal person. But even more than loving movies, sometimes, I become a little bit obsessed with them. If you know me at all, you know my longstanding movie obsessions: The House of Yes, Rushmore, Leaving Las Vegas and American Psycho. All for different reasons, ranging from clever dialogue to social commentary, falling in love with a character to being just the most damn heartbreaking thing, ever.

But aside from these major movie obsessions, I also get mini-ones. Like last year? I was slightly obsessed with 127 Hours and Aron Ralston's story for a couple months. But it has passed and now I just regard it as a fantastic movie for which James Franco was robbed of an Oscar.

A few weeks ago, the whole family sat down to watch Donnie Darko. Somehow, I forget that every time I watch this movie, I get slightly obsessed. Thinking about it, googling it, talking about it, dissecting it.

Luckily, D reacted similarly, wanting to watch it again almost immediately after finishing it the first time. For days, all of our car rides to and from dance consisted of the tossing back and forth of different Darko theories.

This time, my obsession only lasted about a week. D's however, is still going strong. So strong, in fact, that waking up to this on the fridge yesterday put her in a good mood all day:

So, what do you think happened? Time travel? Different dimension? All just a dream? 

Bloggin'

I got inspired by someone else doing a blog ALL the days challenge. So, I challenged myself.

Right now this song is stuck in my head:

And, I am 100% addicted to Pinterest . 

Let's hope I have more things to say on other days.